learning from illness -- one of those Damned Life Lessons

The thing about Crohns' is that nobody really 'has it' in the same way. I'm fortunate enough to be in remission most of the time, allowing me to almost* forget that I have this disease at all.

And then the Universe sees fit to remind me.

What annoys me the most about yesterday's flare-up is that I lost an entire afternoon/evening of work, which means that for the past few days I've only been able to work on two of the three major projects I have going. Since stress can worsen my symptoms, this also may be the Universe's way of saying "finish the first, then start the third, damn it, you're not Superwriter."

*grumble*

But, considering I have a double-handful of things to do in addition to the Three Majors Projects (including a short story I just agreed to write), this may be good advice.**

In fact, it's probably good advice for anyone: take on a a little more than you can handle -- that's good for you, and teaches you limits -- and how to move past them. But -- even in this crazy, "OMG we're all going to be out in the street unless we work constantly" days [and yeah, we're all feeling it], there's a point at which you have to stop, breathe, and find zen. At least for ten minutes

By finding Zen I don't mean slacking out or vegging in front of the television. I mean ten minutes in which you simply sit quietly and let everything inside you settle, consciously letting go of all the stress and worry and deadlines, and letting yourself be -- and taking note of where you are when you are being yourself. And yes, the irony of using an active tense to describe meditation is not lost on me, and may in fact be the point. This is not a passive meditation.

Breathe. Don't work. Don't consciously chase logic patterns or contemplate your toes. Just breathe and be. Feel out what's inside you, and where you want to go next.

And then go back to whatever needs doing.



*I have to be constantly aware of what I eat, since that can worsen a flare-up, but that's become part of my day-to-day routine and I barely notice it any more.
** this did not, of course, stop me from just now writing down all THREE major projects on my to-do list for the day. *facepalm*

required reading for writers and living-with-writers and raising-a-possible-writers.

oh god. *dies of the funny and the truth*

Novelists Eric Puchner and Katharine Noel collaborated on a long essay for The Rumpus about the tricky art of marrying a fellow novelist.

The footnotes are what makes the thing. But oh dear. Yeah.


EtA: and for those still following the Kitchen Kronicles, the plumber is here, and we are waiting on the wayward granite delivery/installation guys....

I haz kitchen!

The day started with the promise of the countertops being delivered "first thing in the morning." First and second thing come and go, no granite. Meanwhile, the plumber had arrived and was setting up the stove (why does the plumber set up the stove? The plumber also has 'lectricity skills. This will come in handy, later).

Many e-mails back and forth between myself and Joel the Contractor-worth-his-weight-in-rubies-and-gold, specifically wondering about the location of the granite guys. The countertops finally arrive while the plumbing guys are getting lunch. Apparently traffic on the Deegan was so bad it took them until 1pm to make the 30 minute trip. But no worries, they're here, all is... what do you mean it was cut the wrong size?

[flashback to me saying to granite guy: you going to make a template? Him: No need, I've been doing this for 20 years. Me: oooookay....]

Small amounts of Cranky Client ensue, and I am afraid to admit I channeled Elaine Koster in retrospect, it was more Phyllis Grann. (those of you who know the name may cringe now). More e-mails and phone calls and all four workmen disappear out to their respective vans. I sit and stew and am Cranky. But thanks to Joel worth-his-weight-in-rubies-and-gold, and the plumbers, who were willing to Wait, Damnit, until everything was finished, the granite guys were able to recut the granite on-site, and install it today.

At which point all that was left was to hook up the sink (new) and dishwasher (old). The sink was no problem. The dishwasher...

Plumber-guy, down on the floor:
"Give me something sharp."

Me:
"No bloodshed on my new floor!"

Plumber's Assistant:
"It will wipe away."

*time passes, circuits are thrown, tests are run*

"Oh. Oh, that was so not code."

But the plumbers, being also worth their weight in, oh, sapphires, saved the day, and before 5pm I had a Fully Functional* Kitchen.

And oh, it is lovely.


When I bought this apartment the kitchen was like a nightmare out of "Designed to Sell" -- everything done on the cheap, for surface appearance and not usefulness. The previous owner didn't cook. I, as you may have gathered... do. An all-white kitchen with glossy laminate surfaces might show well, but it did not wear well. And the less said about the 20" stove, the better.

( here there be Before and After pics )

And now... I shall live on pasta and tinned tuna for the rest of the year. But it's worth it....



* pending the installation of carpentry bits and the backsplash that's yet to be chosen....